Grateful for My Mother’s Wisdom
In Jeremiah 1:5, the Lord says, “Before you were conceived in the womb, I knew you.” What the Lord told Jeremiah is the same truth for all of us. Every child is a gift from God, and He created each one special and unique. In His infinite wisdom, God provided the Bible, as a wonderful resource for all things pertaining to life, including parenting.
Parenting is not an easy job, and not to be taken lightly. It comes with a lot of responsibility and decision making. And I admit, I questioned my own parenting skills on more than one occasion.
My two daughters were born 16 years apart. You would assume the knowledge I gained from raising my first child enabled me to do better with my second. And in many ways that was so, accept in one area. When I prepared a meal and my youngest daughter said, “I don’t want that. Can I have something else? Instead of saying, “No” I often obliged, not a wise thing to do. Would this have been tolerated in my home growing up? Certainly not!
Mom had two choices on her daily menu: Take it or Leave it. You could ask, “What for supper?” but that would be it. There was no, “I don’t want that,” or “Can I have something else?” A smart person would choose to eat what Mom prepared. Breakfast was a long ways off considering we ate supper, as we called it early. My stepfather got off work at 4:00 pm, and supper was ready when he walked in the door. Mom was great cook and baker so our family could count on hearty delicious meals.
My mother was never stressed out at meal times. She planned her meals for the day and didn’t concern herself with whether we liked or wanted what she had prepared. I saw firsthand that it worked for her, so I should have handled mealtimes as she did.
I don’t expect anyone to eat something they don’t like or find unappealing. For me; it’s anything that contains blue cheese. Yuck! Yes; there are times when making something else is feasible; but should never be the norm.
I believe there’s a wise woman inside of me, but I didn’t listen to her. I chose to prepare something else because someone didn’t want to eat what I was serving. What was I thinking? The stress I had put on myself was of my own doing.I justified my actions by thinking that my daughter wasn’t getting enough to eat. On school days she normally skipped breakfast, and ate very little at lunchtime. Logic told me, if she was hungry, she would eat, but I wanted to ensure she did so I cooked whatever she wanted. Not only is cooking two meals time consuming; it’s expensive, and not necessary.
One day while browsing in a bookstore, I came across a self-help book written for women. I opened the book and a profound statement jumped out at me. “Don’t complain about what you allow.” I didn’t buy the book but that statement got deposited in my memory bank.
When the truth of these words hit me; I realized I was doing the complete opposite. I complained to friends that I had to cook two meals. No, the truth of the matter was, I chose to cook two meals, and unless I did something about it, I better quit complaining.
Reality told me there was plenty of healthy food in our home. Worrying that my daughter would go hungry was absolutely ridiculous. I rehearsed in my mind how I would respond next time I was asked, “Can I have something else?”
The day came for me to put my response to the test. “What’s for supper, Mom?” I smiled and answered her question.
“Can I have something else?”
I smiled again and replied, “No; this is what I prepared, and I don’t plan on making anything else.” To my astonishment, she filled her plate, and appeared to enjoy her meal.
It felt so good to make a decision and stick with it. I no longer felt guilty if my daughter chose not to eat what I prepared. It took a while, but the “take it or leave it” wisdom of my mother finally rubbed off on me. I’m so glad that I took that trip down memory lane. Should do it more often, I’m grateful for the wisdom imparted by my mother over the course of her lifetime.
My daughters are married now with children of their own. They have their own way of doing things, and are great mothers. I pray the wisdom attained from my mother, and my own life experiences will benefit them in some tangible way. When I read Titus 2:3-5, I reminded that older women are to encourage the younger ones. What an amazing ministry opportunity; young wives and mothers in need of encouragement are all around us. God enabled me to grow in wisdom; I pray He will direct my path to help younger women grow in theirs.
Anne-Marie Madore is the author of God Said, “I WILL” Promise Book. She writes a weekly post on her God Inspired Blog found on anne-mariemadore.ca
