Breaking the Silence and Bringing the Noise Back Into Marriage

As wives and mothers, we can sometimes long for quiet and time for ourselves with no interruptions. We cherish those “be still” moments when no one is asking anything of us and we can completely surrender to calm without the chaos.

I am no different than most wives. I love conversation with my hubby. I love to watch movies with him, or sit and make plans for our next adventure. He is an amazing gift that God brought to my life at just the right time.  

That does not mean, however, that I don’t sometimes crave silence or desire an opportunity to get inside my own head and see what God is saying to me, or what He might be leading me to share with others. And often, in my home, that quiet has been hard to find.

This past summer, I experienced much quiet time. My family was away at our summer business, and I found myself at home alone many nights. 

At first, this was quite a treat!  My bath could take as long as I wanted. I could sit and write without interruption. I could experiment with graphics at my leisure. Ah… the absolute joy of silence!

After weeks of this summer lifestyle I learned a thing or two. The quiet gets old really fast. I missed the sounds of my home. I missed my hubby’s voice. I missed the laughter and the quietly whispered “good night.” I have discovered that the sounds of silence can be deafening.

How Do We Create the Silence?

How many times in a day, a week, or a year do we long for some silence? How many times do we under-appreciate our husbands and what they bring to our days?  How often do we fail to lift them up, encourage them, and spur them forward?  

Sometimes the silence isn’t just in the voices we don’t hear. Sometimes the silence is in our hearts…hearts that have stopped speaking words of affirmation to our husbands. Hearts that have stopped longing for every minute with that man, and started craving more time alone. Hearts that have walked away from the things that bring unity in our marriages and walked towards the things we can do on our own.  

If the Lord had not been my help, my soul would soon have lived in the land of silence. (Psalm 94:17 ESV)

How important it is to remember that when we find ourselves in these situations of silence, we can call on the Lord for help. We have the amazing ability and privilege to cry out to him for strength and guidance, and help to find our way out of the silence and back into the beautiful noise.

Ladies, let’s concentrate on bringing the noise back to our marriages. Let’s focus on the things we love about our husbands, and set our sights on the things that draw us together. We should ask God for guidance and direction to move away from the silence and back towards the voices that we love so dearly. Let us all have hearts to break the sounds of silence.

How Do We Bring Back the Noise?

Take some time to sit in the presence of God and ask him to reveal to you:

• In what ways have you stepped away from your husband and the time you spend together?
• What is it that you need to eliminate from your life that gets in the way of time with your spouse?
• What do you need to add to your life that would draw the two of you back into a more united relationship?
• How can you lean into God’s word to help you find that beautiful noise?

The time and energy we put into our marriage is time and energy that God will honor. It is valuable, well-spent, and much-needed.

Let’s be intentional to break the sounds of silence and put the noise back into our marriages. That is where the joy is found.