HOMESCHOOLED
In the Classroom with God
August 30th, 2023
See, I’ve been in the classroom lately. With God. And while the lessons have been extremely difficult, excruciatingly painful, exhaustingly real, they also are the purpose of a patient Teacher’s Lesson Plan—extravagantly designed for my good and ultimately His use. And He is (home)schooling me so I may know that He has my best interests strategically in sync with the beat of His heart.
TODAY’S LESSON: the LONG WAY HOME
Psalm138:8, ‘The Lord will perfect that which concerns me.’ (NKJV)
I can relate.
The last several weeks, we have been studying how hard-headed and stubborn, determined and deaf the Israelite children were. What should have taken them only eleven days to arrive at the destination to which God gave them directions, instead took forty years! Can you imagine?! That’s like taking the long way home, going the extra (millionth) mile (LOL), getting lost, well…for years, maybe heading out to a disclosed location and changing your mind enroute, then arriving at an entirely different undisclosed destination. Like decades of wasted years and opportunities and unrealized potential and promise.
I wandered too for about forty years after becoming a follower of Jesus. This realization almost severed me. See, I accepted Christ as my Savior as a little girl in a Backyard Club at the age of five or six. I would reaffirm my faith in Jesus and beg His forgiveness every time there was an altar call. My childhood was tricky, and I didn’t see how Jesus could accept and love someone as stained as me. I didn’t think He’d stay; once He knew what I really was like deep down, He wouldn’t love me either and He would give up on me too. I thought if I was a better person—more lovely, more needy, more capable, a straight ‘A’ student, more pure, less deceptive, less blemished—that He’d be able to love me then. I kept trying to clean myself up, so I’d feel acceptable enough, only to fail time after time.
Then, in high school, I joined my church’s youth group, and it was led by a remarkable youth pastor and his wife. I learned from them that Jesus loved me regardless of what I had done and what had been done to me, and that no matter what I did, good or bad, Jesus would never love me any more or any less than He did right then (and right now). I learned that God’s grace was like an ocean and could never be drained. This is when I believe I truly became committed to being a Christian. I grew in my understanding of God and in my relationship with Jesus.
I wanted to be sold out to Him. But as the enemy would have it, life happened, and his voice was louder, his enticements dangled more delicious, and my choices more devastating and long-lasting. I would wander for the next forty years, playing with fire, hidden in the shadows, feasting off empty morsels of untruth, choosing to see all the giants in the land around me waiting to step on me like I was but an ant, and every once in a while, circling back around to my faith in God. I tried anything I could get my hands on to fill the incessant desolate hole inside of me, only to end up more and more hollow and devoid.
Forty years after my high school attempt to walk (loosely) with Jesus, I finally found myself mired in a pit, staring up at the face of God, realizing my Promised Land was within reach. I stood right on the ledge of the place of refuge He had directed me toward decades prior, flowing with purpose and contentment and protection. I acknowledged that even partial obedience is still disobedience, and I surrendered, so I could homestead His land, call it home, and begin to work His field for harvest.
The journey, my long way home, has not come without cost and its share of troubles, but one thing sure about being ‘soul’d’ out to Jesus, there is protection against pitfalls and detours, because everywhere He goes, I want to follow. He says in I John 4:4 (TPT), ‘Little children, you can be certain that you belong to God and have conquered them, for the One Who is living in you is far greater than the one who is in the world.’ I am convinced I stumbled and wandered for a lot of years, like forty, but there is nothing as rewarding as walking with Jesus, as being in step with the Lord.
Recently, while going through a transition in our lives and ministry, the Lord gently reminded me yet again, to fix my focus on His face, to keep my heart upon its knees and to put my feet on His path, and His alone. I reminisced how profound and prophetic that Word was since I’ve been so enthralled with an eleven-day journey lasting forty years. The Lord wants to make sure we don’t wander one moment or mile longer than He intends for us to, as we seek His destination and purpose for our future. He has passionately placed this heart within me and my husband to share Jesus with the lost, hurting and searching, so they too can have the confidence in a ‘Happy Forever After’. The day and the hour is late, and I’m pretty sure, there is no time to waste anymore.
HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT:
Are you wandering, and if so, what (& who) are you in search of? ______________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________ .
Have you ever decided to follow Jesus, and if not, would you like to? What is stopping you? ____
____________________________________________________________________________________________ .
There are people who will help lead you to Jesus. Don’t waste another day. Or mile. Or pray this prayer with me right now (because I truly believe it is important not to waste another minute—I wish I hadn’t wasted so many!) “Dear Jesus, I am a sinner and I have chosen sin and myself over You and others and what is right. I am sorry and I ask Your forgiveness. I have tried this life apart from You and it isn’t working, so I ask You to help me. This is my new beginning and I want to be soul’d out to You. Amen”
‘I hear the Lord saying, “I will stay close to you, instructing you and guiding you along the pathway for your life. I will advise you along the way and lead you forth with My eyes as your guide. So, don’t make it difficult; don’t be stubborn when I take you where you’ve not been before. Don’t make Me tug you and pull you along. Just come with Me!”’ (Psalm 32:8-9, TPT)
