Brittany PannapackerSingles

When God Says No

Have you felt yourself stuck in a dark void waiting for some sign of hope? Have you questioned God’s goodness and doubted if He truly desired you to have any happiness in your life? I’ve experienced very dark seasons that never seemed like I would pull through. Every plea for help, every broken dream, every desperate prayer for deliverance seemed like it was returned with a “no” response.

When we’re in a season of deep darkness and God feels distant it’s incredibly tough to find determination to continue on when we can’t see how much longer the road of fogginess and pain continues on. We’re told to live day-by-day, but sometimes we feel like we can’t even endure the uncertainty and negative responses to our prayers one moment longer. We grow weak. We lose hope. We question if God is truly for us. We wonder if God is really working for our benefit. We doubt that He will ever answer with a “yes” to any of our persistent prayers.

One of the many areas I’ve struggled with a consistent “no” answer is in singleness. Being 27 and still single and never in an official relationship has caused a deep wound on my aspirations of being wife and mother. I see other women much younger than I, being chosen by a man, loved for their beauty and personality and raising children while I’m struggling to even find a close friend who will stick by my side. Every potential romantic relationship I desired has ended with bitter silence, rejection and a resounding “no” answer. I honestly admit that I have grown incredibly doubtful of God’s desire for me to become married one day. I’ve questioned if God was intentionally withholding something I’ve desired for so long out of spite for my happiness. I know the answer deep in my heart that God’s character doesn’t work that way, but I know I’ve allowed Satan to dig in and cause doubts to grow regarding that area in my life.

This past year has felt like my prayers in every area of my life have been returned with a “no” answer. My future has never been more foggy, uncertain and unknown. Nothing in my life right now makes any sense and I’ve been longing for something secure to hold onto. I’ve found when God replies with a “no” answer to my prayers the most difficult part is not knowing if it will ever be a “yes.” I don’t know how long the wait will be. I don’t know if He will ever bless me with the desires of my heart. How long until it will occur? Will it ever happen?

It’s been ever so difficult to place trust in God when I’m so uncertain of His plans for me. I grow discouraged looking at my messy life and wondering how much longer until He will work through this brokenness. When will I see revival and purpose for all the heartache, pain and suffering? When will my brokenness be restored into something of beauty? I become worried that God is working in my life, but I don’t know how hard it will get and how difficult the pain will become.

What helps bring light into the darkness of the valleys I have faced is remembering one simple truth. Whatever we experience here on this earth, no matter how earth-shattering or depressing, it will all be made right when we reach Heaven. All those moments when it felt like your life didn’t meet up with the success of others. All the times you felt like a failure. Unaccepted. Unwanted. Misunderstood. Forgotten and alone. Every deep cut that has torn your heart, making it feel broken beyond repair will one day be made perfect. Our mishaps, discouragements, disappointments and pain won’t just be vanquished in Heaven, but they are intentionally preparing us. They are strengthening us and molding us to be more like God. Each circumstance that breaks your heart is allowing you to become more equipped for your eternal home.

With every “no” answer that feels like your life is drifting farther away from where you thought you’d be, is still in fact helping lead and direct you onto the perfect path God has established for you. If God’s timing provides a “yes” answer to our prayer it will supply us with an even greater opportunity to see Him working and blessing us with such a long-awaited blessing. As long as you are persistently praying for God’s direction and His will to be fulfilled, you don’t have to become discouraged that a “no” answer is leading you astray. Often times Satan wants to derail us in our walk with God just before something great is about to occur. Satan wants to get us so caught up in what we don’t have that we lose sight of all that God has blessed us with.

What prayers have you prayed that God answered with a “yes?” What prayers have you received a “no” to that you are grateful you didn’t receive a “yes?” We may not understand God’s reasoning for His “no” to our prayers right now, but there’s perfect intentionality and He’s got a plan, and believe me, it’s an amazing one. Trust Him, remain persistent in prayer and keep seeking Him, because tomorrow may just be the day He will answer with a “yes!”

Romans 8:18: I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.

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