Christian LivingPractical HelpRisa Haasbroek

Why You Should Get Angry But Not Act Angry

Why you should get angry but not act angry.

Ever wondered what Paul means when he tells us in Ephesians 4:26, “Be angry and do not sin”?

Paul tells us to not BECOME angry but to just EXPERIENCE our anger.

This is the kind of advice modern psychologists give their clients all of the time. The Holy Spirit led Paul to write down the insight that we need to process our feelings, instead of reacting to them more than 2000 years ago. Of course, our Heavenly Father can tell us how to deal with our emotions in the perfect way, because he knows us so well.

When we react to our emotions instead of processing them, it’s usually when the sinning Paul warns against, happens.

Here are six tell-tale signs you’re reacting to your emotions instead of processing them properly. You:

· yell

· blame

· hate

· embellish your story

· add some drama

· act out in any way

Telling yourself over and over again “I shouldn’t feel like this,” will bring you no relief. When you fight against your anger or when you refuse to feel it, you just make it worse. It will drain your energy to keep these unwanted emotions out of sight all the time.

There are more productive ways to manage your emotions. One of the most life-changing skills you can learn is to allow your emotions instead of acting them out.

When you allow a feeling, it is very important that you observe it with compassion. Give yourself permission to feel everything you want to feel about what’s happening.

Begin by trying to find exactly where in your body you are experiencing this feeling. It’s different for everyone, but here are some of the common body sensations for anger:

· Your heart feels like it’s racing

· Your heart pounds in your chest or your head

· You breathe faster

· Your muscles tighten

· Your whole body feels tense and on edge

· Your face burns

Give the feeling a name. Use a single word to describe it if you can. What flavor of anger are you feeling? Rage? Indignation? Fury? Annoyance? Irritation? Resentment?

Talking to yourself during the process can be very helpful. Tell yourself: “I am processing anger” or “I’m choosing to feel anger” or “I’m willing to experience anger.”

When you allow an emotion, you look at yourself from the outside. You observe how you are experiencing that emotion. So, allowing a feeling means just sitting there quietly feeling it. It never means acting it out.

The wonderful thing that will happen when you allow yourself to feel an emotion like anger all the way through, is that you will be able to see that feelings are manageable and can do you no long-term harm.

There is a second part to that verse in Ephesians 4:26, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.”

It’s an important point Paul brings up. You want to process an intense emotion such as anger as it arrives and don’t want to shove it away. If you don’t pay attention to it as soon as you can, it can fester and ferment and create even worse problems for you.

Learn to deal with your emotions by calmly allowing them in your body, looking at them from the outside. And do it as quickly as you can with especially the intense ones, such as anger.

Because the Philippians 4:7 standard is what you want to restore your emotional life to as soon as possible, “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Link for the photo

risa4coaching.com/hi-there